Hardy the Tardy

Hi. I’m Hardy. Where I come from, we are not given names actually. Humans already gave me many though: water bear, tardigrade, or moss piglet… because of the way I look, they say. It doesn’t make any sense to me really, in my opinion, I rather look like an eight-legged potato with the pipe of a vacuum cleaner in my mouth. However, the people of JOSHMARTIN simply call me Hardy.

How I managed to end up here? Well, that is a story for its own: I was in space recently for a long-term study. The likes of me are often hired for stress tests under extreme conditions you know. We are pretty hardy when exposed to extreme temperatures, radiation, dehydration, and things like that. We simply contract to a heap of biomass and these conditions don’t bother us anymore. It’s called cryptobiosis – for me, it just feels like deep sleep though.

In this so-called tun state, I can be dehydrated, froze, cooked, contaminated, or even shot into space without bothering much. Sooner or later I awake and feel awesome.

Anyway, I was cruising around in space when suddenly out of nowhere a space shuttle floated past me. In the cockpit, some very surprised astronauts watched me, gaping. Obviously, they didn’t expect me up here. Smile and wave I thought, which seemed to raise their interest: the people took me aboard. Ever since my new friends are totally fascinated by me and show me off everywhere. They even plan to perpetuate me on the entrance door of their headquarters on earth. Haha, crazy. But that’s how humans are, I guess. And I must admit that the JOSHMARTIN crew kind of won my heart. Even though I haven’t got one. Anatomically speaking.

Where the journey leads, we all don’t really know yet. For the time being, I’ll come aboard from time to time and I’ll maybe appear here and there when the time seems right. In the meantime, you can meet me where I feel most at ease: in space with a jet pack on my back.

See you.

– Hardy